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Reason and madness in English soccer

Imagine if Charlie Sheen lived under the auspices of the English FA. In such a world, the authorities wouldn't take his children away but, rather, would pat him on the back for his forward-thinking family model. Two goddesses and a boy -- brilliant, Charlie! And he wouldn't get kicked off his sitcom. Instead, the producers might just sack all the other actors and turn the camera on Chuck, 24-7. Reality TV is more unpredictable and dramatic, anyway. There would be no passing of judgment, no slaps on the wrist and certainly no need for Charlie to do the talk-show rounds to explain himself.

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